BrandBurn
AI marketing roast

Your marketing asked for this roast.

Submit your website or business presence for a brutally honest, genuinely funny AI critique—then get specific fixes that help turn more visitors into customers.

Roast my businessSee how the burn works

Free roast. No agency pitch. Share only if you want to.

BrandBurn hero

Sample verdict

37 / 100

“Your call to action is playing hide-and-seek. It is winning.”

What to expect from every roast

Honest

Direct feedback without made-up praise

Actionable

Clear problems paired with practical fixes

Yours to share

A result card you control, never auto-posted

Roast. Diagnose. Repair.

The joke lands. The advice pays off.

BrandBurn turns an awkward marketing audit into something you will actually read—and a plan you can actually execute.

01

Submit what customers see

Drop in your website, Google listing, logo, social profile, or storefront. BrandBurn reviews the marketing your customers actually encounter.

02

Get roasted, not patronized

Receive a funny, direct critique, a score out of 100, and the three to five issues costing you attention and trust.

03

Turn the burn into a fix

Upgrade for rewritten headlines, stronger calls to action, content ideas, positioning, and a practical plan you can use without an agency.

Pick your level of intervention

Laugh for free. Pay only when you want the fix.

Start with the roast, then choose how far BrandBurn should take the repair work. Every paid package is a one-time purchase.

Business Roast

Free

Find out what your marketing is doing wrong.

  • Website score out of 100
  • Funny marketing roast
  • Three biggest problems
  • Shareable result card
Get roasted
Best first fix

Fix My Business

$19

Replace the weak copy with words that work.

  • Full AI marketing audit
  • New headline and description
  • Social-media bio
  • 10 tailored content ideas
  • CTA recommendations
Fix the damage

Business Makeover

$99

Rebuild the message across your customer journey.

  • Website rewrite and page structure
  • Brand positioning
  • 30 social posts
  • Ad concepts
  • Google Business optimization
Get a makeover

Need ongoing help? AI Marketing Department plans start at $199/month with weekly content, optimization, and reporting.

Before you volunteer for the burn

Fair questions. Straight answers.

Your website thinks it is doing fine

Let's hear a second opinion.

Get the laugh, the score, and the three problems worth fixing first.

Roast my business free